Can You Hear Me Now?

The internet at the JC is restricted.  They have blocked Facebook, iTunes, YouTube, Pinterest, Netflix, Hulu, and IMDB.  They discourage us from using Skype and sending photos home through email because it slows the internet.  Luckily, there is a Facebook proxy site (fake Facebook) that we use to get our Facebook fix, or else we'd all be socially damaged by this semester.  But I digress.

The point of all that is to illustrate the limitations on our internet and further highlight the value of unrestricted wifi.  Fortunately, the JC is a mere ten minute walk away from Hebrew University, where there is high speed internet available for free.  Unfortunately, campus is completely closed and shut down Friday afternoon through Saturday evening for Jewish Shabbot.  Even more unfortunate, this was something I didn't discover until Friday afternoon.  After wandering from closed gate to closed gate.  And being rejected by two security guards to be let onto campus.

"Guys, wait... nope, it's gone.
Let's keep going."

But my friends Rachel and David, who were accompanying me, were persistent, and we kept circling around the Hebrew U outer fence.  David held out my iPad and stopped anytime it picked up an internet signal.  Most of them were dead ends, but we had a really good time stopping and starting in the name of decent wifi.  

Finally, we hit gold.  Ironically, it was about one hundred yards away from the start of our circle.  More was the irony when my battery died shortly after loading the new One Direction music video and I ended up taking a nap while David and Rachel uploaded pictures to Facebook.  The signal only worked in certain spots and was better depending on where the user was standing in relation to the stationary computer.

Super fun times.  We thought about sneaking onto campus under a parking lot gate, but that seemed to be a violation of JC rule #3... don't do anything stupid.  And by "we," I mean me.  Thank goodness I have friends who are smarter than I am.

Purim... Israeli Fun!

Ok I just want to start by pointing out how clever my blog post title is.  Purim- isreally fun! Israeli fun!  Get it, get it?  I'm super proud of that, because I thought of it all by myself and I don't want anyone to miss how smart I can be sometimes.

Tonight was the best night of the semester- by far.  Tomorrow is Purim, a Jewish holiday where people get drunk and party.  Definitely my scene.  People get really into it, with costumes and parades and lots of parties.  We were invited to a Purim party hosted by the guy who led the Israeli folk dance class last week.  Sketchy dance party invite from a mid 40s dance teacher?  Heck. Yes.

The real party started in the van.  Our ride was a sketchy white van with tinted windows and blacklights.  Awwwwyeahh.

You know those movies where people dance and everyone knows the moves and dances in partnerships, perfectly in sync?  That happens in real life.  At least here, it does.

Super psyched to get our dance on

We only knew a few of the dances, but it was pretty easy to fake it.  Step ball change, grapevine, spin.  And repeat.  The other party guests were kind enough to lead me through several of the dances.  I think it was more for them than me, because if I didn't know the dance I made up my own moves and got in everyone's way.

In the room just outside the dance floor, there were three tables.  One was covered in masks, hats, wigs, and costume jewelry.  One was covered in candy, cookies, soda, and pastries.  One was covered in various bottles of beer, tequila, and other alcohol.  Guess which one we didn't empty?  The costume table.  Because we arrived in costume.

(Just kidding mom.)

You best believe our stereotypical Mormon selves hit up the refreshment table and emptied it out.  I wasn't even hungry, I was just eating because it was free food.  My friend Kara even snuck a bunch of candies out in her skirt.  Because three square meals each day just isn't cutting it.

Friends, it's official.  Purim is where it's at.  New favorite holiday, for sure.

Seriously, best night of my life.

Breaking News

Last semester when I heard about the hostile situation and bombings in Israel I was a little worried.  I was afraid the Center would close and I would lose my chance at international growth due to terrorism and violence.  Indeed, most people were surprised that I would risk my safety to live here for a semester.  Many were worried for my sanity and safety and tried to dissuade me.

For all those who are concerned, I present the following:

Folks, worry no more.  The photo above is of today's headline news.  If cottage cheese is front page news, I think my safety is a non-issue.  I appreciate your concern, but it's probably better spent elsewhere (for now, anyways).

I Mustache You A Question

Something terrible is coming over the boys at the Center.  It's a bad case of the above-the-lip-flavor-saver.  Several of the boys have decided that there is no one worth impressing, and are growing out their mustaches.

Despite living in the midst of a culture in which a mustache is the ultimate sign of manhood, and to be bereft of such is to be stripped of one's dignity and masculinity, our Arabic teacher does not have facial hair.  He says it is because his wife hates it, and he is happy to make his wife happy, but I think otherwise.  Last  week he was making derogatory remarks about the well grown mustache of my classmate, Sawyer.  The joke's on him though- no one hates on Sawyer's mustache.  No one.

In show of solidarity, we decided to grow our own mustaches.  Myself included.

Our teacher hated it, of course, and wanted us all to leave the classroom until we were "clean shaven."  I think I looked pretty fetching.  And the best part about it?  It's Honor Code Approved.

Valentimes are the Best Times!

So turns out Valentines is kind of a big deal here.  Not necessarily in the city (although I did pass several stores that were decorated to the nines), but definitely in the Center.  It was like I was in elementary school again, and I loved it.  I cut out hearts, made crappy decorations, shared date stories, ate entirely too much chocolate, and danced it all off at our in-center dance party.

My favorite part about the day was the chance to write a cheesy pick up line on a note for each of my classmates.  In turn, I got my own share of paper hearts, corny pick up lines, and sappy declarations of love.  I even got a note written in Hebrew.  Of course I don't know what it says, but it was folded in the shape of a heart, so that can only mean good things, right?

So Happy Valentines Day to each of you, and just know that if I had a star for each time I thought of you, I'd have the whole night sky in my hands.

Couch to 10K in Two Weeks

Welp.  I guess I'm gonna check #1 off the list on March 1st.  And then some.  I just paid $36 to do something I hate in the name of growth and personal pursuits (or something).  Running.  I honestly don't think I've ever run more than a mile in my life, and yet I just signed up to run six of them in a mere sixteen days.  I'm full of apprehension and anxiety, and of course I found out there's a 5K option within minutes of making the final payment... But that's ok.  This is a year of achievement.  Sixteen days and counting!

My Alter Ego

Remember that sweatshirt I bought on impulse?  Well the buying process was so short, I never actually checked the size or tried it on.  Turns out it's two sizes too big.  Don't get me wrong, I still LOVE it, but I do endure a fair amount of gentle(ish) teasing from my friends about how the 90s wants the sweatshirt back.

Keep that in mind as I explain my latest dumb purchase. I passed a stand of glasses and sunglasses and tried on a pair of big fake glasses (as a joke, of course) and fell in love. Again, I HAD to have them. They were 20 NIS ($5).  As a penny pincher, that seemed high and probably negotiable.

I girded my loins, reviewed my bartering experiences, went in to talk to the shopkeeper... and promptly forgot everything.  I'm sure I looked like a goldfish and sounded like a dumb American.

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
You wouldn't know, it's kind of an obscure number.

Me: "How much for these?"
Shopkeeper: "20 shekels."
Me: "Uhh... well... mmm..."
Shopkeeper: "You want a discount?"
Me: "Yes."
Shopkeeper: "15 skekels."
Me: "Sold!"

This story doesn't end there.  I was wearing The Sweatshirt over my regular shirt that afternoon.  Paired with the glasses, I morphed into a hipster, just shy of an androgynous haircut and Instragram account.

We decided my new hipster identity is deserving of a hipster name.  Something old fashioned, classic, and rare.  Thus, Hipster Katherine was born.  She appreciates the underground music scene (a lot of really deep and thought provoking artists that you probably haven't heard of), shops at Anthropologie and Salvation Army, is cultured by French new wave cinema, and rides a fixed-brake bike to conserve energy and save the environment.

Ironic sweatshirt + hipster glasses + collared shirt = Hipster Katherine

Status Update

My brother asked me how 'arabland' is, and if I've been 'blowed up yet?'

The answer is no, unless you count blowing up via pita overdose.  In which case, the answer is absolutely yes.  What I'm trying to get at is that I haven't really been keeping anyone up to date with what I do or how I am.  So here goes:

• I'm obsessed with pitas that are slathered in peanut butter and nutella.  Except they don't serve real peanut butter or nutella here.  They give us 'all natural' peanut butter (weird) and chocolate flavored spread (why is it flavored like chocolate?  Why can't it actually be chocolate?).  Separately, they're terrible.  Together... kryptonite, and the likely source of my JC20 (like the Freshman Fifteen, but so much worse).
• I'm proudly developing a watch tan line.  I wear it like a badge of honor and encourage its development at every opportunity.  I hope to return with cosmetic proof of the excessive amounts of time I spend doing vaguely outdoorsy things with my class.
• My ability to sleep anywhere is growing.  My favorite place to sleep is in the study rooms.  I push the chairs together and sleep in the fetal position.  Yesterday I took a forty minute power nap on the floor in the student lounge at 10pm.  Last week I took a fifty minute power nap underneath the seats in the auditorium.  I laid down to sleep during the ten minute break and my friends left me there for the rest of class. 
• The latest I've been able to sleep in is 8:36.  It was not as glorious as I would have hoped.  Probably because it was still early morning and mornings are terrible. 

In sum, things are pita-rific.  I could complain, but who wants to hear that?  In the meanwhile, lunch is in a mere two and a half hours, and I have to make a promise I know I won't keep to stay away from the pitas.

Shock and Awe

Yes, we sang the IJ theme song
over and over on the walk in

Last week I crossed something off the list.  I went to Jordan (yeah, the country, not the place in Utah) and saw Petra.  Petra, as in the second wonder of the modern world.  I spent the first hour nearly speechless.  I felt like gasping and spinning in circles.  Quite a few of the sites we've seen have been reduced to "piles of rocks" in my memory, and that's what I expected from Petra.  I didn't know what I was getting into until I walked out of the valley and saw the Indiana Jones famous treasury.

And if that wasn't cool enough, the sites became increasingly spectacular as I kept walking.  In America, nothing is older than four or five hundred years.  In Petra, nothing is younger than a thousand years. 

For a wanderer like me, free standing ruins were like a birthday present come early.  They were just open to anyone, free for clambering and exploring.  Obviously I had a blast.

Mom, dad, it's pretend jail.  I promise.

So. Many. Jumping pictures.

Making new friends...

...all sorts of new friends (young and old, human and camel...)

I consider this a successful cross off.  I've never seen anything so beautiful.  It was easy to see the hand of God to the right and left as I walked through and marveled at the landscape and scenery.  When I was up there, I felt like I could accomplish just about anything.  It was incredible, inspiring, and entirely unforgettable.  Am I the luckiest, or what?

Jeru-Co

Today I went shopping with a few friends. Not clothes shopping, not souvenir shopping... grocery shopping. Kind of. My roommates and I were looking for some snack food to prevent death-by-hunger on the Sabbath and after early dinners. So we went to Costco. Jerusalem style.

Just down the road is a market that sells food stuffs in large bulk, hence the kindly inappropriate nickname "Costco." The bulk items is about where the similarities stop. The real Costco is clean, organized, full of helpful employees. Looks a little something like this:

The "Costco" here looks like this:

It's an open warehouse with uneven floors and dirty shelves.  Small children followed us at an uncomfortably close length and local men stared.  In Arab Costco there are no prices- you take the items in question to the counter and ask how much.  The men behind the counter appraise you, glance at the item, and bark out a price.  We're still trying to figure out when and where bartering is appropriate and how the prices are even decided (apparently blonde girls get lower offers).  Everything is already so cheap, it's hard to imagine driving the price down any further.

Basically it was a party.  The best part?  The room that is entirely devoted to Israeli sweets.  Seriously, does it get much better than a multi pack of chocolates for less than three dollars?  I think not.

Note the super fashionable fanny packs and matching lanyards...
I'm pretty sure I'm at EFY on steroids.